Polly Nomial Conversation

Annoy: -5

Why do you goad me so with your exasperated whining?

Apologize: 2

And I endorse your humble mea culpa.

Brag: -2

Disabuse yourself of the notion that you are something singular... dork.

Call Name: -3

What do you gain by tossing such vicious invectives?

Cheer Up: 2

Verily, good tidings come to those who hope.

Complain: -2

Why all this sniveling and yammering?

Compliment: 3

Your nebbish felicitations do mean a lot to me.

Cry: -1

Why dwell in lachrymose despair when your time on earth is limited?

Entertain: 2

You have a beguiling sense of dramatic timing.

Flirt: 3

Your furtive advances will not go unheeded, my dear.

Give Opinion: 0

Your hypothesis is compelling but your argument is an unworkable tautology.

Gossip: -2

I do not engage in scurrilous rumor mongering.

Insult: -5

I take vehement exception to your guileless effrontery!

Intimidate: -1

A nonentity such as yourself cannot coerce a genius such as myself into anything but laughter.

Jibba Jabba: 3

Jabba dabba do!

Joke: 2

Your brand of low-brow buffoonery makes me titter with glee.

Rude Gesture: -4

What a curiously crude gesticulation!

Talk about Aliens: 1

The incidence of an extraterrestrial invasion would certainly bewilder me.

Talk about Art: 3

Is there an objective application of aesthetics to nerdy eye-glasses?

Talk about Books: 2

I would sooner amputate my nose than allow the pilfering of one of my academic tomes.

Talk about Cars: -2

I am dismayed at the rampant employment of automobiles for short- range locomotion!

Talk about Computers: 2

The advent of the data processor represents the apex of human achievement!

Talk about Construction: 2

The fabrication of architectural wonders is not as exciting as the designing of them.

Talk about Cooking: 0

To apply quantities of kilojoules to unrefined animal tissue is not an experience I relish.

Talk about Crime: -3

Our local law enforcement agency has been loath to implement DNA testing into its repertoire.

Talk about Dancing: -2

Under the hypnotic influence of a steady beat, corporeal gyrations are an embarrassment to behold.

Talk about Exercise: -3

It is with some chagrin that I admit to the neglect of my physical well being.

Talk about Games: 2

Increased random elements in any game have an equalizing force on all players.

Talk about Graveyards: -3

There the recently deceased are interred to repose for the greater part of eternity. Leave it alone.

Talk about Health: 1

I have quite a hardy constitution despite all the time I spend indoors.

Talk about Hobbies: 2

Reading old dictionaries from bygone epochs is my favorite diversionary activity.

Talk about Home: 1

I have a formally functional if somewhat Spartan domicile, which is all I require.

Talk about Home Decor: 1

My latest domestic accoutrement is a decorative slide rule.

Talk about Hygiene: 0

To ward off septic contagions it is best to perform ablutions with hot, treated water.

Talk about Jail: 1

I would rather sleep in a black hole than be incarcerated in a penitentiary.

Talk about Jobs: -3

If you ever assist Dr. Moore with his lawn gnome operations, remember this: you don't have to line up all the germs in a straight line.

Talk about Miniopolis: -3

I have spent the bulk of my life living in the Miniopolis municipality.

Talk about Movies: 3

Motion pictures are axiomatic at a rate of twenty four-frames per second.

Talk about Music: 0

Though the foundations of music are mathematical, I still find it hard to enjoy.

Talk about Nature: 0

The remarkable resilience of the biosphere is equaled only by our relentless attempts to subdue it.

Talk about Ninjas: 0

That is but a phantasm, a fable borne from your overzealous imagination.

Talk about Politics: -1

It is our civic duty to bathe in the daily tide of political life, however lame it may be.

Talk about Rep Groups: 3

I am what you may refer to as the head stateswoman of the General Nerdie Assembly.

Talk about Science: 2

I have devoted my life to the application of scientific method to phenomena heretofore unconsidered.

Talk about Shopping: -2

I abhor excessive displays of conspicuous consumption.

Talk about Simoleons: 3

I am rather adept at abstaining from the deleterious financial harms of overt conspicuous consumption.

Talk about Sleeping: 2

A profoundly important passtime!

Talk about Sports: -2

What you call athletic merrymaking is nothing more than a brutish charade to me.

Talk about TV: -2

Growing up in my parent's domicile, we called it the idiot box.

Talk about Theatre: 0

Burlesque, cabaret, drama, satire... all just pitiful display of irrational tomfoolery.

Talk about Travel: 2

I embarked on a junket some years ago to promote the university. Since then I haven't left the city.

Talk about Work: -3

I pursue no traditional vocational trade. I am an academic.

Talk about the Bayou: 0

That despicable place is purported to be habituated by a plethora of mythical monsters.

Talk about the Carnival: -2

I rankle at the thought of those miscreants roaming our thoroughfares.

Talk about the Coffee Shop: 2

The physiological effects of caffeine on sapiens are not to be discounted as irrelevant.

Talk about the Cosmos: 3

It is my life's mission to one day circumnavigate the earth in a interstellar craft.

Talk about the Law: 2

A well functioning judiciary yields benefits innumerable.

Talk about the Lounge: 0

For the keen speculator the Casino's fiscal dividends are considerable.

Talk about the Market: 2

An unparalleled locality at which you may obtain premium quality sundries.

Talk about the Museum: 1

To preserve our cultural memory it is important to support your local historical relic repository.

Talk about the Newspaper: -2

I am too preoccupied with scholarly matters to consult a daily periodical.

Talk about the River: -2

Don't talk to me about that festering tributary!

Talk about the Supernatural: -2

The supernatural, being by definition outside the natural world, is not worthy of scientific inquiry.

Talk about the University: 3

I am currently pursuing my third PhD researching the feasibility of time travel.

Talk about the Weather: 2

Meteorologically speaking, Miniopolis is not a very active place. But the warmth is nice.

Talk about the World: 3

I have a tender view of this azure marble we call the earth.

Tease: -5

Your taunts and barbs perforate my hide!

Tell a Bad Pun: 3

Your lewd, scatological misappropriations of language for comedic effect are dull at best.

Tell a Secret: 1

I am flattered you have taken me into your confidence so lackadaisically.

Hug

I feel I should decline your request to embrace.

Kiss

I am not one to osculate so freely!

Gift (Accept)

An unsolicited gift? How magnanimous of you.

Gift (Reject)

I have no use for baubles of that description.

Errand (Accept)

Indeed. Would you deliver this astronaut pen to [Sim], post-haste?

Errand (Reject)

I am not in need of any assistance at this time.

Move In (Reject)

No, I do not require a moneyed cohabitator.

Silent Treatment

You have squandered the opportunity to speak with me today.